Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
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there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
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A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
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