he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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