doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
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