a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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