I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
