Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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