at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
