Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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