What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
