just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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