airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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