so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
