You really coming over, don't trick.
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Randomize
