TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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