i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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