If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Randomize
