Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize
