This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
