you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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