is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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