Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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