South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
