this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Randomize
