I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
