hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
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