yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
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