dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
wow bdsm is so cute
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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