I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
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