Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(320): View more from Minnesota

Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks

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(847): View more from Illinois

Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.

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(905): View more from Ontario

he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love

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(646): View more from New York

Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.

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(859): View more from Kentucky

By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day

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(208): View more from Idaho

If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.

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(504): View more from Louisiana

That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.

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