They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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