Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
