drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
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