My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
