I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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