we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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