Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Randomize