is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
