There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
