so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Couch. On fire.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
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