She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Randomize
