We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
You made out with two different species that night
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
