so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
