I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Randomize
