no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Randomize
