They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
