I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
The chlamydia really affected his face.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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