fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
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