he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
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