I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
