i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I think people are normalizing furries
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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